I AM IM

On this happy day off, thoughts turn to work.  Where instant messaging makes it oh so easy to engage in professional conversations such as this:  


Doe, Jane  (not her real name) :    1343637 - please review. thx.
Doe,  Jill (not her real name) :    yesm!
Doe, Jane :  Yanks yots.
Doe,  Jill :    we sound so retarded!     chus a mimit
Doe, Jane :   jes keepin it weird!
Doe,  Jill  :    hahahah
Doe,  Jill  :    done, red to delete, green to add! I mean gween.
Doe, Jane:     you are vunderbar.
Doe,  Jill  :    now i want some candy!
Doe, Jane:    I always want candy.
Doe,  Jill :    what was Dan's name again?    uncle...
Doe, Jane:    Schumley.   You could also call him Nad (Dan backwards) or even Nadley.   He's the baby of the family - we pretty  much tortured him all the time.  haha.
Doe,  Jill :    ha! we did that with our baby sister, she turned out okay.
Doe, Jane:    He's okay too....just don't mention his bat legs.  haha.  Seriously.  Don't.
Doe,  Jill :    hahahah!
Doe,  Jill :    chan...fife...chan...fife
Doe, Jane:    that about sums it up!
Doe,  Jill :    that little icon is cute I like how he sniffs after he finishes crying
Doe, Jane :    oh yes - very cute!  I was looking for a cute one to send back, but couldn't find one that fit.
Doe,  Jill :    I know...we need MORE icons!
Doe, Jane:       yup!
Doe,  Jill :    oh that's great!      if you are really mad about something!
Doe, Jane:     good one!
Doe, Jill :    !
Doe, Jane:    Looks like the whole famdamily!
Doe,  Jill  :     that them!!!    wetarded
Doe,  Jill :     not that there's anything WRONG with that.
Doe, Jane:    don't go getting PC on me now...
Doe,  Jill :    I was hoping it did not offend you, but how do you ask something like that without offending somebody!    hell, I even offend myself sometimes.
Doe, Jane :   Believe me, my sense of humor is very off the wall and jaded.  I can find humor in anything, as long as that's all it is.  I know you wouldn't say something like that in any other context, and neither would I.  right?  right.
Doe,  Jill :    right!
Doe, Jane:    And I wouldn't say it to just anyone.  I have a friend here who takes everything so seriously, I can't make any kind of generalization comment like that or she gets offended.  Unless we're talking about men, and then she's worse than me!
Doe,  Jill :    cheeze is it my sister?
Doe, Jane:    Or your brother from another mother??
Doe,  Jill :    ok I can only get so deep at this time of night.
Doe, Jane:    I couldn't think of anything to rhyme with sister.
Doe,  Jill :    nope.    it's not coming.  It's 6:24.    I got nothing
Doe, Jane :    me either.  darn.
Doe,  Jill:    I love that last icon!!!!    That's what I look like right now!!!
Doe,  Jane:    Kinda how I look most of the time... ozoned.
Doe,  Jill :     lol!!!! I am getting giddy!
Doe, Jane:    my sister from a ___ mister.  Fill in the blank.  Your turn.
Doe,  Jill:     ooohhh good one...  sister from a minister mister?   sister from a sinister?
Doe, Jane:    close...
Doe,  Jill :    no cigar
Doe, Jane:    we'll have to work on it...
Doe,  Jill:    oh!     sister from a darky mister!    ok now I am offending myself.
Doe, Jane :     supposed to rhyme with sister and mister.
Doe,  Jill :    ook.    I am laughing so hard!    A darky mister!
Doe, Jane :    you're cracking me up too.
Doe,  Jill  :    this has got to stop. someone has to stop it.
Doe, Jane:    It would have to be blister mister or pister mister?  Okay - that's pretty bad.  How about twister mister?    Love the stop sign!
Doe,  Jill  :     I couldn't wait to use it
Doe, Jane :     You set that one up well!
Doe,  Jill :     thank you as i said i will be here all week


Now I can't wait to go back to work!  

Share a Merry Christmas...Here was ours!

Click the link below:


http://debmills853.tripod.com/lunaticlobby

Then click on the Christmas 2009 link next to the blue ball at top left corner for our christmas video.  It will download and play in your windows player.

On A Cold Winter's Night

She slipped into the room silently.  It was a room that would only admit the most sorrowful, the most despairing, those most thoroughly bereft of hope.  "Psyche Triage" said the sign on the door.  No one saw her, no one heard.

The room was bare.  Ugly plastic chairs lined up against plain walls, no pictures, no carpet, scuffed tile floors, no music, no TV, nowhere to look. Except at the people, lost souls who could only see an abyssmal absence of light, a black hole from which one might never return. One, a young man with his head shaven, tatooes covering both forearms, wept silently into his hands.  A young woman sat on the floor under the pay phone, sobbing into the receiver.  Another sat quietly with her husband, nodding as he spoke to her softly.  One man, handcuffs just removed, walked back and forth, feet touching the patterned tiles only.   Another young woman talked non-stop, to no one.

The tatooed man looked up as he felt a stream of fresh cold air pierce the suffocating room.  His eyes were red and filled with pain.  Somewhere in the back of his mind he heard a woman say "You know it will be all right, don't you?"   He thought maybe it was something his mother had said once.  When she was still alive.   Maybe that  was true, he thought.  He had been here before.  The only thing he really knew for sure was that he had to hold on.

It occurred to him that his situation was like a battle.  He was a soldier fighting for his own life.  He vowed to advocate for himself.  If one person refused to listen, he would insist on talking to someone else.  He would not back down from the medication mix-ups, the bungling bureaucracy, the failures of "the system."  But now, for right now, all he had to do was take the next step.  Talk to the counselor.   Even though this was a hell of a place to be, it was better than being outside, doing the things he had been doing outside.

And then there was a flutter, on the top of his shaved head, like the lightest touch of a feather or a mother's gentle kiss.   His tears flowed freely now, no longer tears of anguish, but a cleansing wash of relief. Even from this deepest well of paralyzing depression, he could see the stars.  And even though they were very far away, he knew it would be all right.

She silently slipped out of the room.  This night's work was done.

How's My Bedroom Makeover Going?


It's not finished yet, need the new end tables and the paintings for the bed wall...but take a look!  I am liking it.

Ready for Bed,  Houston

Give me sensory deprivation....that's what it takes for me to get to sleep these days.  This is what I look like every night before going to bed.

First goes on the BiPap, the piece of plastic with plastic "pillows" that fit in each nostril, allowing me to breath all night without sleep apnea constantly waking me up.

Second, I have to tape my mouth shut because of dry mouth and also the sleep apnea.

Chuck wants to watch TV?  No problem!.  I put on my sleeping mask with little eyelashes on them.

And lastly the gigantic earphones are the only ones we have that fit in my CD player, on which I usually have an audio book loaded to block out the tv and lull me to dreamland.

And that's why I have to take an Ambien every night.  Especially the nights I wear rollers in my hair.

I WOULD LIVE FOR ART  

BUT I WOULD STARVE

Anyway I have been working on these pieces for my bedroom this weekend and it has been great fun.  The ones in the top picture are finished and ready to put up and that's the fun (not) part.  I have been screwing eye holes in the back and I lost the picture hanging wire I bought the other day and it is such a hassle to get everything even and level.   Yeah,  I would live for art if I didn't have to hang the dang things.

USE YOUR RESTAURANT VOICE!

Little grandchildren make a lot of noise.  That is why you may see them in television commercials with their grandfathers, but TV commercials are only :30 long.  In real life grandfathers really don't spend too much time with the little ones.  You know why?  They hurt Grandpa's ears.

Even when you ask them to use their "indoor voices" the decibels are still unbearable.  That is why this past weekend they offered to use their "restaurant voices" and that seemed to work for a little while.  Try it.  Restaurant voices.  I guarantee it will come in handy.

"We fear change."  - Garth Algar, Wayne's World

I don't want to switch to Microsoft Enterprise Office 2007.  Please don't make me!  Learning curves, keyboard templates, a little arrow chasing its tail, RIBBONS....and this little magical logo that does everything?  The moniker already sounds outdated, 2007?  Come on!  and Groove 2007?  GROOVE?  That's a blast from the past.  And when do we put 2007 aside for Office 2010?  Why can't we just go directly to 2010?  Apparently Office 2007 offers more choices than ever before.  That's the problem! More choices, more options, more decisions!

I remember when all these mind-boggling choices first caught my attention.  I was buying pantyhose.  There were all kinds of different colors, reinforced toe/heels, all day massage, tummy control, sandal foot, regular everyday, satin shiny for evening, built in panty, etc.  I was immobilized.  I could not choose.  There were too many.  And of course that is the idea.  The makers want you to spend more time with their product.  The more time you spend, the more money you will spend. And novelty.  There always has to be something new.

This marketing idea has spread to every corner of our consumer society. Have you checked the fabric softener aisle recently?  So many scents and ways to soften your clothes.  Crackers, soups, pasta....I wonder how many people just walk out of the store without buying anything, too overwhelmed by the sheer volume of possibility?  And how many ways are there to clean a FLOOR?  Or wipe one's butt?  It is the paralysis of the infinite...avoid it like the plague.  Pick one and just go with it.   And don't ever change.

Not every holiday is for celebrating. Some are for remembering.

THANKSGIVING


Thanks for:


1.  My husband chuck, who cleans the lint filter after emptying the dryer and who, after everything I do, re-does it right.


2.  My children, who although having proved that parenting by intimidation does not work are nevertheless using the same method on their own kids. 

3.  My mother who even though is not that intimate with reality still manages to make me laugh once in a while.


4.  Facebook, which has made me realize how many wonderful people I know.


5.  The internet.  Before the web, I did my surfing by walking down every aisle in the library with my head sideways.


6.  A job that I kick ass at and can go to work wearing a towel.


7.  Whatever gave me the faith to redecorate my bedroom when we don't even know where the next mortgage payment is coming from.  


8.   Hello Kitty who has no mouth because if she did it would ruin the whole effect, like how not understanding the words to certain songs makes them more magical and cool.


9.  My grandchildren, who do and say the funniest things, like Aysha when she had two dolls named Jean: one little Jean and one big Jean the lesbian.  And Jordan who feared the haunted house at WDW, saying "but what about the ghostly apprehensions" (should be apparitions).  


10. All the fish.

CHUCK & DEBBIE PICK A MOVIE Since our bigscreen tv bulb went out, what Chuck and I do every night is pick a movie and watch it on the TV in our bedroom.  It isn't easy to pick one we both like,  though.Here is an exchange from the other night: ME:  You wanna watch Mr. Bean? CHUCK:  No.  ME:   No I mean the one where he's a spy.  CHUCK:  No. Why don't we each pick five.    ME:   OK.   Sky Captain, Holy Grail, Office Space,  the 40 year old Virgin, and War of the Worlds.  CHUCK:  Here's my five:  Starsky and Hutch, StarTrek First Contact, Step into Liquid, Without A Paddle and Silverado. ME:  SILVERADO!  Okay, why not the entire season of Fat Actress then? CHUCK:   Hey, we could watch Step Into Liquid with the commentary. ME:   We've done that before.  Is there something  with Easter Eggs? CHUCK:  The only Easter Eggs I can find are just  extra footage that was cut. ME:  I don't consider cutting room floor stuff  an Easter Egg.   CHUCK:   Okay, okay.   Well out of all yours,  I guess I would pick War of the Worlds.   ME:  Good, because out of all yours I would pick War of the Worlds.  CHUCK:   Okay.  And that's how we pick our movie for the night.

 

My List of Books to Read by Diva: Poet/Socialite/ Revolutionary.         
(Bracelet shown available Signals Catalog)

I don't know about your weather but it's a wet rainy weekend where I live...perfect time to curl up with a book...I'm heading for the library tomorrow with a list:

Water music : a novel by Boyle, T. Coraghessan.
Perfume : the story of a murderer  by Suskind, Patrick.
The end of Alice by Homes, A. M.
Agent of chaos  by Spinrad, Norman
Island of the sequined love nun Moore, Christopher.
Flow my tears, the policeman said by Dick, Philip K.
The man who japed by Dick, Philip K.
Confessions of a crap artist--Jack Isidor: a chronicle of verified scientific fact, 1945-1959 by Dick, Philip K.
Eye in the sky by Dick, Philip K.
Angelhead : my brother's descent into madness by Bottoms, Greg.
Sentimental, heartbroken rednecks : stories  Bottoms, Greg.
My mother's keeper : a daughter's memoir of growing up in the shadow of schizophrenia Holley, Tara Elgin.
The tenant of Wildfell Hall by Bronte, Anne.
Blood meridian, or, The evening redness in the West by McCarthy, Cormac.
Blindness by Saramago, Jose.
The death of Artemio Cruz by Fuentes, Carlos. Pop. 1280 by Thompson, Jim, 1906-1977.
Another day in paradise  by Little, Eddie.
The visit; a tragi-comedy.by Durrenmatt, Friedrich.
Fugitives & refugees : a walk in Portland, Oregon  by Palahniuk, Chuck.

THE ONE

THING

I WOULD

TAKE

IF I HAD

TO BE

STRANDED

ON A

DESERTED

ISLAND

I would take a bandana. Why?

They can be bandages, tourniquets, wash rags, sweatbands, sunscreens, kotex, face masks, dog leashes, bow ties, ear warmers, chafe protectors, belts, bathing suit tops, diapers, trail markers, bottle holders, gas cap replacers, gear tie downs, suspenders, neck coolers, napkins, arm slings, train robbing disguises, hobo bags, hankies, luggage identifiers, talkative seatmate gags, potholders, slingshots of biblical proporations, and fashion statements.

Don't leave home without one.

YOU STILL HAVE THREE DAYS TO GO BACK IN TIME!

http://blog.texrenfest.com/

The one and only Texas Renaissance Festival will continue this Saturday, this Sunday and the Friday after Thanksgiving. After that, you will have to wait until next year. I cannot say enough about this experience. Pictures can't capture it, words cannot impart the authenticity that is created in this world among the pines, so far from, yet so accessible from the 20th century. It is just wonderful. Check out their blog. And go, if you can.

SCREEMING MAMMOGRAM DO YOU SEE THESE THINGS? DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY ARE? THEY'RE NIPPLE MARKERS!!!! NOW I HAVE FOUND TWO MORE THINGS I HATE TO DO: 1. Take off the right nipple marker. Scream. 2. Take off the left nipple marker. Scream again. THESE STICK MUCH WORSE THAN BANDAIDS. MORE LIKE SUPERGLUE! AND DON'T LEAVE THEM ON WHEN YOU GO INTO THE STORE: YOU WILL LOOK LIKE YOU HAVE BB-SIZED NIPPLES. YES, GO AHEAD AND GET YOUR MAMMOGRAM. BUT WHEN YOU SEE THEM COMING WITH THESE THINGS, RUN!!! IF THEY CATCH YOU, TELL THEM NO NEED... YOUR NIPPLES WILL BE IN THE EXPECTED LOCATION, THANK YOU! AFTER ALL, THEY DON'T MIGRATE LIKE TEETH!

ANOTHER ONE OF LIFE'S LITTLE MYSTERIES

I was taking a picture of my bananas in the backyard, and the picture came out with all these little circles. What can these be? They're not orbs, they're not rods...has anyone else ever seen these before?

Total Bedroom Makeover!!

I don't know what got into me, but it was one of those moments when all the tumblers of the lock to the universe aligned themselves and...it was time. Time to redo my hideous bedroom.

When I told my husband what I wanted to do, he asked me "Have you ever painted a room before?"

"Sure," I said. "Lots of times." I did not tell him that this had been 30 years ago. So I am at that point where I can't change my mind about this anymore and I must see the reformation through to the end. It's not a good place. I am tired. Everything is in disarray. I just want it to be all over with. I hate HGTV for making it look so easy.

Anyway, The first picture below is wall #1 "DURING" as it looks right now. It has been primed and that's all. Because it is going to be an "accent wall" it will be the last wall painted (in Aspen Aura). You can also see adjoining wall #2 has not quite been completed with its first coat. The second picture below is wall #1 "BEFORE". The entire room was a sickly mauve color when we moved in. The furniture was a mixture of mine and my husband's (we've only been married 3 years). And the dresser was trashed out because I was cleaning out the drawers.

Now the next picture you see below is wall #3 "BEFORE" showing more of how bad the room looked with all that mauve and old furniture and mattresses on the floor. UGLY!

And the picture following that is wall #3 "DURING" or as it looks now. This has both coats of the new color which is Spring Green.

This shows wall #3 "BEFORE" and "AFTER", the junkiest, ugliest part of the room. It is finished and has the second coat and is finished except for the edges.

Oh, and here are the new beds, still in their boxes. Hey, it's a work in progress. It will get done.

SPOILED HORSES!

There are some really spoiled horses in Spring, Texas that have their own house. This actually looks like it used to be a pretty nice house, but evidently the horses took over. Sometimes you can drive by and see them looking out the window. It is located on Cypresswood between 45 and 59 off 1960 if you want to take a look sometime.